Tuesday, February 25, 2014

The Passing of Time


February 17th came and went and I didn't remember that it was Jz's birthday. I thought about it a few times before the date, and didn't remember again until the 18th. In the past I have grilled burgers (his favorite food) and sipped scotch to celebrate his life. This year it came and went without my marking the occasion.


At first I was sad and a little mad at myself for forgetting. Then I realized it means I have moved beyond grief and enjoy a happy new life with Jeff. It doesn't mean I have forgotten Jz at all.

On the New Hampshire home front, my Mom has had some rough days. Her nurse and physical therapist think she will see a big improvement by the end of the week. Thankfully my sister has been able to stay with her and Dad. As for me, I am trying to avoid the feelings of guilt for not being there. Not easy when you were raised Catholic. ;-)


4 comments:

  1. You'll never forget, there will always be a Jz shaped part of your heart. But you deserve happiness and a life as well
    xx gz

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  2. what a lovely tree of remembrance, memories soften and mellow but are just as sweet and wonderful.

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  3. Thank you Gwyneth, I know that you speak from experience.

    Linda, the tree is a fall photo I took in the apple orchard behind my pottery studio in NH. The storefront is the barn that the studio was housed in. It was a wonderful place to make pots with lots of history.

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  4. Yes, you deserve to be happy, you deserve to have a life. It doesn't mean you've forgotten Jz or that you care less. It means that you are honoring him and yourself by living.

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Don't be shy, talk to me... I won't know your out there if you don't!