Some years back my elderly parents announced that they were only buying Christmas gifts for the grandchildren. We adult kids were getting too hard to buy for and they asked us kids to please not buy them anything either. I continued to buy them something every year, I just couldn't imagine not!
...and then there was December of 2008.
John died on the twelfth of December. I obviously had not done any Christmas shopping. I returned to work within the week... the thought of being home alone in an empty house was unbearable. Work would keep me occupied. I drove past the mall everyday, to and from work. Finally one evening I decided I needed to stop and doing some Christmas shopping. I wandered around the mall feeling like an outsider, walking through a world that I didn't belong to. How could all these people be happy and festive? How can the world continue to be business as usual when I have experienced this tragedy? I left the mall and drove home without making a single purchase.
At some point I did manage to get my daughter and her boyfriend a gift certificate and I made some chocolate peppermint bark. Christmas dinner was at my parents, everyone was there... the chocolate peppermint bark was forgotten at home (but I did remember the gift card). It was a really nice Christmas day spent with the family I love. Like the Who's down in Whoville, Christmas still came without all the gifts and fanfare.
Since 2008 I don't stress about Christmas gifts or really buy much of anything except for my daughter, and even there I keep it simple. Sometimes you have to learn the hard way.
